Coaster Brake Challenge, Week Three – Off the Ledge

Team Flying Pigeons downed Racer in the 2nd Coaster Brake Challenge, Race 3.

Team Flying Pigeon's downed Racer in the 2nd Coaster Brake Challenge, Race 3.

The dry, dirty, heat of San Fernando Valley summer has compacted this year’s Coaster Brake Challengers into a tight-knit clique of bike survivalists and nut cases. Hangers on and mere thrill seekers have dropped from the last two races: out of gas, out of water, out of their element.

Flying Pigeon Racer coming round the bend on the 3rd Coaster Brake Challenge race of the series.

Flying Pigeon Racer coming round the bend on the 3rd Coaster Brake Challenge race of the series.

Here is a missive from our Team Flying Pigeon rider, Msr. C. L’auter, after running wet and dry through the hills surrounding The Valley in Coaster Brake Challenge Race 2, “Lower Case ‘D'”:

re:coaster challenge
an open letter as to why there will be a lack of footage at the next open screening at the bike oven.

first off there were critical reports that i disliked the pigeon and was seen working on another (yellow) bike.

this is an erroneous rumor started by the competition in fact the Racer has characteristics that amaze others in the field. we (team pigeon) are still trying to find it’s optimum acceleration curve while dealing with a few minor mechanical issues.

Case in point,i rode for three days before realizing links were missing from the drive chain-a lessor cycle might have failed on the spot.

as far as style and its design lines ,one comment over heard at the last course sums it all up – ‘it’s the cutest bike here!’

and what of the course,this paul fellow from atomic’s true color has surfaced.

the italian pig dog dragged us thru some tar filled,fly infested, hepatitis-c polluted, swamp pit.it started to mimick a bad ‘made for tv movie’ scenario with characters vanishing every ten minutes;at last report a fellow rider had met up with’ranch hands’ as the available light and the temperature dropped. with no
provisions,illumination or a sense of direction;numerous search parties were dispatched till it became apparent that the authorities and resources would needed to be deployed.some of the veterans
among us have talked about a boycott,similar to this years twelfth stage of the giro, as the routes unpaved and poorly marked, are rife with sand traps and overcrowded triple geared zealots .on this afternoon, a coyote’s howl breaks the quite night-the rider still unaccounted for some two hours after the nearest competitor finished -and then as only the valley can conjure up,a mysterious screech fills the darkness. a local identifies it as the mythical choppracabra ,,, testing it’s new stomping grounds.

“you ain’t afraid now ,are you?’,he asks.

“are you kidding, this is like a killradio monthly meeting.as long as they don’t spike my water bottle with the purple koolaid i’m here for the long haul!”

as we prepare for next week(more on training to come) two kudos are in order:jake rose who was a spectator turned participant put in a fine showing: and of course dingo-sporting armadillo colors and rattled from last fridays midnight ridazz’ wonderland shooting.resurrected in a few hours (at the oven) a fully functional coaster from the discarded dreggs of last seasons’ pile.

“i’m riding for team chicken leather!”,he joked,having built up the ‘old birds’ (huffy) aluminum cruiser.

Still to come: hollywood lurks at a new ‘green’ door step
or rebel without a sanity claus

Things got crazier this past Sunday, our team rider reports, with half the pack dropping out of the race and Dingo winning the race.

There is only one more race left in the 2009 Coaster Brake Challenge – this coming Sunday, July 26, 2009. It looks like Team Flying Pigeon is out of contention for first place, but surely a points victory on style and finesse are in the works.

For more on the Coaster Brake Challenge:

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One Comment

  1. Posted September 20, 2009 at 10:50 am | Permalink

    funny, well written. The Malaria Pit was avoidable, you just hadto see the sign that said “trial” with an arrow pointing to the left.

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